but what does profound mean? according to a quite random Google search, i found the following result:
pro-found (adj.)
1. situated at, extending to, or coming from a great depth; deep.
2. coming as if from the depths of one's being
well, I don't know the exact deepness of my thoughts and feelings, but they seem to be coming from a pretty deep depth of my being. especially here lately when my entire future is starting to mold and take shape into something that I am so very not prepared for.
step number one in my future is to graduate. again. and while that seems simple enough, it is kind of discomforting knowing that I will be graduating from a program that I really had no intention of being in. my entire life plan of about six years (that was fully molded and just waiting to be put into concretions) was, in one form or another, rejected. that put a slight damper on the all inclusive "Life Plan" that so many people set for themselves. however, after many facial waterfalls (my pillow still has mascara stains from that one) and a mental reevaluation, I pulled myself together somewhat and conjured up a very quick back up plan. I am currently living out this said back up plan and I ask myself from time to time -and by that, I mean minute to minute- if this is what/where I am supposed to be. I really have no way of knowing this, but for now, it seems okay enough. I guess I will go about pondering this some more. and it very well may make a reappearance at a later post so don't be too caught off guard. we shall see what comes of it, I suppose.
another slightly less profound concept that has complexed (apparently, that isn't a word, but for all intents and purposes, we shall roll with it) me lately has been the word emotion. when i was a little girl, it was very hard to separate from my emotional ties, say to like my blanket or Power Ranger dolls or Barbies. but as I've gotten older, I have realized that my emotional ties are not so emotional. and that's concerning. I suppose that it is most concerning when it comes to friendships and relationships...I don't really know how to elaborate without coming off in some sort of ill manner, but I just think that I should have a little more feelings behind things. maybe my severe lack of emotion could be a good thing? it seems to be an advantage in situations thus far. but maybe it's not? I guess I will soon find out.
and I guess I have completed this post for the time being. I said things that seemed about as profound as I could conjure up sitting in this too quiet computer lab alone with my thoughts. it seems as though I should have a closing statement, like in a court room or something. so, I suppose that I shall start a trend among my posts -I will end each one with a quote that I think seems, wait for it, profound.
I shall start with one of my favorites and leave it be. enjoy.
"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." Albert Einstein
